Thanking my lucky stars

The New Goo is a lonely enterprise, just me talking to myself with no idea who’s listening. And I’m perfectly fine with that. In fact, I prefer it that way. It used to be kind of depressing, but now it makes me feel better because it’s like a narrative mid-20s time capsule, and it compensates for the fact that only picture I’ve had taken in the past three years is the one you see on my profile. Blogs, in and of themselves, as a format, are unedited, redundant, soul-spewing excuses for journalism, written mostly by freedom of speech/mass media junkies. Attempting to clump them together and call it an art form would be degrading every artist I respect and every artist who struggles for respect. Blogs are entertainment, a form of voyeurism, created by perpetual narcissists who get off on others reading our self-satisfying commentary. We could just keep this copy confined to the word processor or some pink journal with butterflies on it, but we don’t. Instead, we publish. And it feels good to publish because we’re getting our voices out there for someone, anyone to read.

I feel like broken record because I keep coming back to this topic, and I don’t even take the time to read any other blogs because I’m too busy reading, writing, and thanking my lucky stars. But make no mistake…blogging may be self-important insignificance, but I take it very seriously. I’m a serious perpetual narcissist. And The New Goo will remain a lonely enterprise for as long as we both shall live. I’m not here to make new friends, provide you with daily entertainment, make the world a better place, etc. I’m here to become a better writer and try to make sense of all the beauty and chaos that filters into my mind on a daily basis. Yeah, I know I should be aware of my audience, but when it comes down to it, you’re a way bigger mystery to me than everything I write, and even bothering to acknowledge an audience would be underestimating its potential existence. This is my one-way street, and they say you can’t boogie on a one-way street. But who am I, anyway? Just a nameless nobody blogger, and regardless of whether I know you, like you, or love you, you’re just a voyeur. I guess this is my way of saying thank you for reading…to anyone and everyone who cares.

Actually, as of tomorrow, I will officially no longer be merely a blogger pseudonym. I will be published. Under my real name. For the first time in seven years. And I thought it was impossible…but apparently someone thinks I have enough talent. But what I wrote was no typical impulsively written New Goo hack material. Instead, I worked very hard to perfect and tweak my article like a finely tuned robot prone to distorted bursts of humanity. Why even post tonight? It’s not as if anything I publish online can compare to the excitement of being published offline…in a tangible, physical form with a real audience that’s not limited to the empty, random www stratosphere. The best part about getting published is that my article has joined a collective effort, alongside work by other writers with different styles and ideas, to explore the seemingly endless limits of an ongoing, constantly evolving discussion. Wherever this may lead, I’m looking forward to finding out, and I appreciate the opportunity to be truly a part of a something after countless isolated, lonely postings on The New Goo.


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