On a line from Herzog

"Two points therefore: He knew his scribbling, his letter-writing, was ridiculous. It was involuntary. His eccentricities had them in their power."

(from Herzog by Saul Bellow)

Today is but a day in the life in my body.
Today I am like Herzog (not as smart, but twice as confused)
Today we are ridiculous and involuntary.
Today my eccentricities have me in their power.

These powerful eccentricities will create word configurations full of empty, fleeting feeling.
This is what I know for sure.
The rest is up to chance.
Every time we use language we take words for granted.

I'll rearrange these words like magnets on a refridgerator.
They redefine themselves on the edge of completeness
They're at our incompetant, mysterious, impressionable mercy.
They'll never be finished.

They shed every insecurity we wear like an old coat on a confident day.
They evade social paranoia when it's preparing to ask us who we think we are.
They long for an audience when the auditorium's empty and dust forms a thin layer of carelessness on the spotlight.
They hide when all we want is to be found
They laugh in the face of fear.
but if fear had a face and words could laugh, would they find comedy?
If rejection could accept failure would it submit to death?
if hate started loving could the truth trust it?

what else?
if questions had the answers?
if the problem had the solution?
if the leaders had to follow?
if the greed started sharing?
if hunger was delicious?
if the power took some responsibility?
if sickness could heal...

what if
is but a suggestion
but what if
all these meaningful words lost their meanings
the language changed so much our minds couldn't keep up
there is an expiration date and it is approaching
Your formula contains constants constantly evolving

looking inward I find nothing
isolated suspended
at the mercy of ridiculous and involuntary powerful eccentricities

Deep down, we don't want the company.
We can't break the habit as it turns to addiction
overindulgent negligence
reluctance to move past the self
the strength to open the will to others
so open to others I will

**